Lesson Learned:
Most of the information you learn on this blog is useless in your everyday life. I have no problem admitting that. But, here's something you need to know, if you don't already. If someone at your workplace is ever collecting money for a lottery drawing, you must participate. You don't have a choice. Honestly, you will never, ever win. You may as well be flushing two dollars down the toilet. The only way your workplace lotto pool will ever catch lightning in a bottle and purchase the winning ticket is if you choose not to participate. Think of it as insurance; a few bucks here and there saving you from would be the worst day of your life; the day everybody you work with becomes rich and quits their jobs. Enjoy the story of the Nebraskan meat-packers who won the Powerball jackpot, but always remember the dummies they left behind who said they didn't have change for a $20.
More On My Obese Hands:
My expanded wedding band has been returned to my finger. There's a tiny bit of room to grow, so the hand exercises have been halted. Thanks to all who didn't judge me and my balloon-animal fingers.
In related news, I was told last weekend that I have incredibly soft hands. For those of you who want soft hands, the only advice I have for you is to stop all manual labor now. Also, two words: sandpaper origami.
Two Blogs That Are Worth Reading:
If you're looking for some quality comedy, try "The Sneeze". Take the time to read some of the "Steve, don't eat it" segments and also the best of the sneeze on the right side of his page. Very funny stuff.
As much as I complain about restaurant service, it's only fair to point out the good stuff. Check out http://www.waiterrant.net/ for restaurant-inspired stories about life.
Clearly, both of these blogs are wildly popular, with thousands of readers, so it's safe to say they don't need my help. My mentioning them is the equivalent of a condo association newsletter telling people to read the New York Times and the Washington Post.
Programming Alert: 
To the anonymous commenter who recommended "The Dog Whisperer" to me, thank you. It is an excellent show and since Mrs. Undaground and I began watching, we have assumed the role of pack leaders in our home. It's going well, but now Wrigley thinks Mrs. Undaground is a bitch (dog humor, folks). You can find "The Dog Whisperer" Fridays at 8pm on the National Geographic Channel. It also runs several times a week in reruns.
Survivor Haiku:
For those of you who taped the show and don't want to see the results, don't scroll down. So I don't ruin it for you, I'll take up some space with a photo of a dogsled racer eating cheesecake.
Goodbye Ruth Marie
sounds like an Elton John song.
Should've been Sally.
...
Terry should now win
with a hidden advantage
that is tough to beat.
...
We here at this blog
support the pale space traveler
and also Cirie.
Can you Haiku? Post your Survivor Haiku here under "Comments". Definition of haiku here.
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