Would the Nurses Even Allow This?

These are exciting times. I forget what it was like before we were talking baby all the time. Between trips to the nursery to paint the latest layer on my Seuss project, I like to engage my wife in some healthy conversation about the birth of our child. Some conversations go better than others. This is one of the "others".

"Mrs. Undaground, I think it will be great to have both of our Mom's here when the baby's born."

"Me too."

"My mom can cook us food. Your Mom can help clean. You and I can really focus on taking care of the baby, feeding the baby, changing the baby, me watching you change the baby, staring at the baby, and teaching him how to hit a curveball."

"Right."

"Seriously, our Moms here will be great for us, because you and I are both going to be very tired and sore after going through childbirth."

"YOU are going to be sore???"

"Well, you saw the chairs that new Dads have to sleep in. They're tiny. I'm a large man."

"So you're gonna be sore?"

"Well, not necessarily."

"That's what I thought."

"I could probably get through it a lot easier. Here's my idea. Are you ready for it?"

"Go ahead. I'm listening."

"After the baby's born, and we're in the post-partum recovery room, and everything calms down... Maybe you should take the chair and I'll take the hospital bed. You know, so we're not both sore."

That was the end of this particular conversation.