Happy New Year

Happy New Year everybody. Hope all of your resolutions are still intact.

I have several resolutions. So far they're all still going strong because I have incredibly strong resolve:

1. Swear less. Last year my resolution was to swear more. I probably overdid it a bit, so I would like for the pendulum to swing the other way. Last year, I was rated R. This year, I shall keep it PG-13. That means I can only use the F-word occasionally, but never as a verb.

2. Exercise. I haven't actually done this yet, but I still have 11 months and 3 weeks so I will find some time to get this one done. I am considering purchasing a used stationary bike, but Mrs. Undaground is concerned that it may quickly become an ugly piece of furniture used only to hang laundry. Negotiations are ongoing. I may have to go see a chick-flick to complete this deal.

3. Come up with a new pet name for Mrs. Undaground. I've been calling her "Baby" for almost 5 years. This was good for awhile, but lately I've noticed that everyone is "baby". My brother calls his girlfriend "baby". We've actually had a discussion about it and he won't budge. Every couple on the Amazing Race calls each other "baby". It's out of control. If I say "Baby" in the supermarket, thirty people respond (and not just infants!). There was a time when I experimented with "Dollface", but Mrs. Undaground is not a big fan of that one. Any and all suggestions are welcome. Recently, I've actually called her by her name a few times, which is pretty cool, but I think I want some more options.

4. This one's a little more personal: Fart in front of Mrs. Undaground. Sorry I had to share that, but now that we've been married for almost a year and a half, I need to do this. I don't want to change the culture of our relationship and do it all the time, I just want to make the option available to me in case there's ever a substantial need. I've already shared this information with her, and she's not really happy about it, but it's just something I've got to do. I should have never let it go this far without letting one slip out, because now I've created an expectation that I'll never do it. I'm just not sure I can age gracefully without this freedom. Furthermore, it may bring us closer together, although I guess her immediate reaction will be to pull away from me. This will take considerable courage on my part and I need to wait for the right time. Looking at my calendar, I'm shooting for mid-Spring on this one.

Those are my resolutions. I wanted to be realistic, and come up with resolutions that are specific and measurable. I am confident that I can stick to all of these lofty goals for 2006.


IN OTHER NEWS -- GO MOUNTAINEERS! Monday night's Sugar Bowl was glorious. It was probably the biggest victory ever for WVU football and I couldn't happier as a fan or more proud as an alumnus. The future looks bright for this team, too, so it's not too late for anybody to jump aboard the bandwagon and enjoy the ride.